I’m not happy unless I’m moaning…

There is nothing/no-one that doesn't irritate the shiz out of me!!!

Goodbye #85 Nemeses..Hello #6

It’s been a long 2 years but the time has come to leave my #85 Bus Nemeses & move on to pastures new (the #6 tram).. It’s been tough at times but we’ve had fun, right? Wrong. I have no affection whatsoever for these chumps. The new crew better have more decorum (smaller, quieter headphones […]

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First Bus of the Week…Deep Heat, Paisley & Banana Man

Why would you think it’s OK to put an insane amount of Deep Heat on before getting on a crowded bus? Who would do that? Sandal Nemesis, that’s who. Sandals maybe thought my senses needed assaulting this morning….or maybe she just needs medicated cream for her cracked heels…… Either way, let’s get those sandals packed […]

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Bus Nemeses – The New Crew

Sloth Nemesis has got a new job.  He had his smart shoes rather than manky trainers up all over the seat. He’s had a hair cut too & had been over-zealous with the gel. I’d not have recognised him if it weren’t for his battered man bag & slovenly demeanour. Sandal Nemesis was maintaining the […]

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The ‘New’ Nemeses

I’ve been observing (seething) about this pair for some time. They sit on my new bus & flank me on the back seat every day….. with their grotty feet on the seats like they’re lounging in their (I imagine) equally grotty homes. The amount of snake eyes I’ve shot at these cretins is countless & […]

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New Year Old Nemesis

I’ve been lulled into a false sense of security. No activity this year… until now. There’s been a Nemesis incident. Nemesis #1 has crawled back out from wherever it is she resides (just down the road ftom me, as it happens). There I was.. ‘happily’ stood IN A QUEUE waiting for the bus….& there she […]

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Final Bus of the Year

You couldn’t make it up… how is this happening to me??!! There’s Bus Nemesis 1, Bus Nemesis 2 and me on the back seat….. AND a massive knobhead wedged in between me & #2 eating a f***ing sweaty egg sandwich whilst encroaching on my space. This is not the back seat of my dreams. My […]

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Feet on Seats

Some people are just outright Bus Wankers & clearly have no social skills or etiquette.. The person in question probably can’t even spell etiquette. WHY DID NO-ONE ASK THE BRAZEN B*TCH TO MOVE HER F***ING FEET???? I can’t be responsible for righting all of the wrongs on Stagecoach buses!! All I could offer on this occasion […]

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Bus Nemesis #5

Finally, after months of torture, my prayers have been answered. Bus Nemesis……….. HAS BEEN ASKED TO MOVE!!!!!!!!! Go on love, SHIFT (although she did still retain her aisle seat which is a little disappointing). I couldn’t resist a blatant neck crane to view proceedings & I’m still smiling. It’s not wind – it’s a genuine […]

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Bus Nemesis #4

SHE’S SAT NEXT TO ME!!!!!! Has she done this on purpose because I’m her Bus Nemesis… or is she completely oblivious to her ability to raise my irritation levels to 100%?? I saw her eyeing the seat next to me – which was free of course coz I’m not an Aisle Seater – & I […]

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Bus Nemesis #3

Disappointing start to the day… Bus Nemesis isn’t here!!! I’m working on 3 possible scenarios – 1. She got an earlier bus (she’s been late for work twice this week & they’re not happy. Heard her on the phone to them yesterday morning… hope they fire her!!) 2. She’s late. Again. 3. She’s been fired. I’m […]

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